to the ocean

Swim in the stream you find yourself in,
and pretty soon 
you’ll be floating free
in the ocean.

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Tidal Wave

I loved him for this reason alone:
that his passion could meet my own intensity.

I wanted to know what it would be like
to be loved with the same intoxication 
that I could feel for another.

(Could it not be said
that I was in love with my own love?
That I was intoxicated
with my own intoxication?)

But there was no substance,
no bedrock to ground us.

We were only fever and feeling,
nothing but a tidal wave
and leaving disaster
in its wake.

my hands

Sometimes I hold my own hands
and they feel so small
tiny as an infant’s
so tiny and so fragile

And yet they feel so old
so ancient
full of deep secrets
and unspoken fears
slender bones of unknowable strength
covered in a fine veil
of such vulnerable flesh

These hands have penned many words
including the ones you read here
They have played the music
which begs to be heard
music which writes itself of thin air
a spirit which teaches my fingers
songs my fingers know not

These hands are an extension
of my very heart
These hands ache for others to hold
These hands want to give
but find themselves empty after so many years
These hands now long so dearly to be filled
but they do not know how to receive

I am the small fragile hands
of an impossibly large spirit
so strong and so beautiful
that it frightens me
because these hands hold the weight
of that which is unseen
eternal divinity

not the 99

I am not the 99
I am the 1 who left your side
I’ve skipped town
and if you want me back
you’re gonna have to chase me down
break my legs, carry me back
So go ahead and do it
If you love me
here’s your chance to prove it
Otherwise
it’s just me
myself
and I
off to find
if the grass is any greener
on the other side

all over

Rushing again and again
love me leave me
sweep me away…
but I’m still on the beach

Nothing is real
but the sun
and this sand
The waves are always temporary

And it’s all over
all over again